A Small Light

I just want to share something small someone said to me that shed so much light on what I think might be the secret experience of many men.

ʺThe world shows a person a way of being that is unsatisfying and you feel unable to chase after something more or something different because all men are experiencing the same thing. There is no love in their marriages, they feel unfulfilled in their relationships and to say misunderstood would be a grave understatement. For any man it is hard to ask more of himself when the world around you tells you that everyone is satisfied with misery and dissatisfaction. The more you live that life the more it eats away at you. I feel lost and I feel better off by myself than with those who show me misery is the only path, most of them are the people closest to me. They model a life that I don’t want to live, but what else is there? ʺ

I know that there are many women to whom this will sound like the greatest cop-out ever. Women who have been hurt, disappointed, deceived, betrayed and abandoned will not just swallow this down. I didn’t at first. The greatest thing that I have ever done for myself is to do for another what I wished they would have done for me had I been in their shoes. To take the time and consider what you’d do if the shoe was one the other foot takes great courage. I believe the strength of a woman’s heart enables her to do so.

Yes, I have already admitted that I love men, hence the name of the blog, so I cannot say that I’m impartial. In fact I’m completely involved and consumed by the interaction between men and women. I think it’s about time that we take different action in dealing with the opposite sex, we as humanity not just us women. Instead of wanting the other party to change can we maybe try to understand each other better? I think just listening, without prejudice, to another point of view can do much to heal the hurts we carry from the relationships we have been in.

I want to change the world by restoring our belief in love and our belief in each other, but we will never do that unless we become open to seeing the world from the vantage point of another.