fathers and daughters 1Early this morning, 26 August, I had a dream about my father. It was around the time when I am supposed to create the day that I wish to live, but I fell asleep instead. Those few minutes in dream world with my dad made me so happy that I couldn’t stop crying. In fact I have been crying like a fool several times today.  That dream reminded me of a kind of love that only a father can give, it reminded me of the value that only a father can add to a child’s life.

What’s great about having a loving and responsible father is the presence of a man whose only agenda in your life is your happiness.There is nothing more safe than being loved by a man who wants nothing from you. There is nothing like having someone in your life who sees you as innocent and pure and precious. There is nothing like having a father who loves you.

There is nothing like knowing you’re loved regardless of how often or how far you get it wrong. A good dad really doesn’t hold all your stupid mistakes, unintentional errors or deliberate mess-ups against you.

In my worst moments I wish I could just be with my dad, although I wouldn’t always tell him what’s wrong. No one wants to disappoint a person who loves you without question. In my best moments I wish he was around for me to show him that his belief in me and my abilities is justified.

In black culture our fathers used to be distant, less so now, but for us our dad’s were not as approachable as our mums. Yet, I have always considered my dad my final wall of defence. He might not have been like the fathers on TV and he might not have been a perfect man, but he stood out above all other men. Truth is, I would be remiss in referring to him as a man. He was never just a man to me, he was My Dad. Elevated above mere mortals and endowed with super-human abilities. I love men, but my dad will never fall into that category.

The value of a father is security, whether it’s financial, physical or emotional; a good dad is like an impenetrable wall in his child’s life. I believe that loving fathers create confident, loving, secure children and their roles should never be diminished. A father who takes his role seriously and makes his presence felt is a shield to those he loves in a world that is often very hostile and difficult.

As a grown-ass woman I would not say no to some fatherly love myself and my heart still weeps for my own 3 children who have missed out on the opportunity to grow to adulthood with a good father in their lives. Their dad was a king amongst fathers and I pride myself on having made such a sterling choice in him.

In a world where the family unit is changing and many women are forced to raise their children by themselves, myself included, I hope that we don’t forget the value of fathers. I hope that we will continue to give our children an impenetrable shield as well as a secure place to return to if need be,before we launch them into the world.

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  1. I’m glad you have a father like that and your husband had shown how to be the best father to your children. I never experienced and I guess never will experience having a very good father, someone to emulate, someone to take care of us, defend and protect us and be depended on although I dreamed he is like that. Blessed are those who knows the value of a father and a father who knows the value of their children. Kudos to you for being able to raise your children alone, it’s not easy but by the looks of it, you are a strong woman and you can do it. Keep up the good work!

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    • I truly feel for those who have never known the love of a father for whatever reason and I truly empathise with you. But the human spirit is amazing in that adapts to whatever situation we find ourselves in can still Shine some Positive Power on those around us. You sound as if you adapted well. Tx for the feedback.

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  2. Yes!!!!!!!!! I was raised in a loving home with two parents who were soul mates. My Dad I adored for he was a creative and a kind man. My memories of my parents are many, the times they danced together, the times they painted together, the times they spoke to each other and shared their talents and guidance. I miss them but hold them within my heart. A Dad is most special and I remember when he passed and his tears while looking into my eyes. My dear Dad!!!!!!!!

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